Friday, February 12, 2016

What's Been Going On in My Life

That's a silhouette of my daughter pointing off to the horizon. 
Pointing in a direction away from me. Which is where she wants to be. 
As a senior in high school, she has been straining at the reins. Hard. 
So, we decided to let her go. 
She has moved to Southern California to live with my sister and finish high school down there. She comes back frequently, and I have gone to visit. But our relationship right now is definitely fraught. It's hard to let go. It's hard to breathe.
But I am blessed with a wonderful family that is looking after her. I am a faith filled person who knows believes that everything will work out.
But still.
It is a difficult time
It is one of the main reasons that I chose Brave as my word for 2016.
I have a lot to brave this year.

I need to be a warrior (a brave).
I need to be brave.

20 comments:

Sian said...

A bit of breathing space sounds like a good idea x

Patio Postcards said...

You are a very brave parent & I can only imagine how difficult this is for you. What's that saying; you give them roots & you give them wings. I like how the word Brave & you are joining up together this year. All will be well.

The Mann Fam said...

I feel your pain. I went through a similar situation except that my kidlets chose to distance themselves by doing things they knew we didn't approve of. Kind of that Prodigal Son situation and many days I had a hard time breathing. It sounds like it may just be some space your daughter feels she needs. Motherhood and parenthood is not for the weak of heart. No one tells you how painful it can be.

Your daughter knows you love her unconditionally and she'll be back. They feel your love and the comfort of "home" drawing them back into the fold sooner or later.

Hang in there...and continue to breathe. Just like they tell you when your doing hard physical exercise. Parenthood is an exercise.

Karen said...

As you know, we had some very difficult times as our son grew up. There were days when I could only put one foot in front of the other to move ahead. It took several years, but as you also know, he went on to do good things, and now is a happily married daddy to two adoring girls. Keep the faith; breathe, and believe.

Lady Ella said...

Can't begin to think, but I sense the pain in your words. Thank you for being real, and may everything work out for the very best. xx

Beverly said...

{{{Maria}}} I can imagine how very hard it was for you and Paul to make this decision and I consider you very brave for allowing her the space. I am thanking God that she has a safe, supportive family to walk through this part of her journey with all of you.

Cathy Keller said...

I can only imagine how hard it was to let her go away from home to school. You have my very best wishes and know I think you are brave! God bless!

Alison said...

Brave indeed dearest Rinda! Sending love and hugs xx

debs14 said...

What a tough decision to make but it sounds like you have found a good compromise by putting some distance between you whilst knowing she is being well looked after by someone you trust. This parenting thing is harder than you think isn't it? Keep being brave, this period will pass. Take care x

Gail said...

Most definitely brave but good knowing that she's with someone you have complete trust in. Wishing you both well this year.

Ladkyis said...

Two strong women in the same house is difficult. Then comes the time when the more experienced woman must use her own strength to enable the other to fly.

I bet you look at her and see a lot of yourself while marvelling at the fact that she is not afraid to make her feelings known.

You and Paul made that feisty and beautiful girl so take pride in her rebellion and send lots of hugs to your sister so she can give them to the rebel in those moments when she gets homesick

Becky said...

That is so very brave of you. I am sure that she will grow through this phase and appreciate what you have done for her. Sending you both positive thoughts for this year.

scrappyjacky said...

So very brave....but I'm sure you'll both come out the other side.

viv said...

I know what you are going through at the moment but it does get better. My children are grown up now and we are close again but it is very difficult getting through it xxx

Susanne said...

Oh my, sorry to hear this. Hope that time and distance eventually heals the divide. Bless you both.

Cheri said...

I'm playing catch up today and this post just hurt my heart. How difficult it must be to have the child you love so dearly want to put distance between you. Stretching their wings and testing their limits are definitely signs that our little birds are growing up and getting ready to fly solo, but that doesn't mean it hurts any less. I'm so glad you have the word BRAVE to guide you through this!

Deb @ PaperTurtle said...

What a poignant photo and words to begin this post with, Rinda. My heart broke for you as I read your words. I wish I had the right words to leave here to give you hope for a quick resolve. Things WILL work out in time, and until then lean on your friends as much as you need to. You certainly chose the right word for 2016. Love you, brave friend! xo

Miriam said...

Oh Rinda, no one tells you how hard it is to be a parent do they? You have faith and friends, strength and love. It will come right. She is young and she is safe thats worth so much. Sending warm and healing prayers.

Melissa said...

Thank you for being brave and sharing this tough part of life right now! So glad you have family looking out for her. I'll be praying that she'll make good decisions and enjoy this final year of school while continuing to be in contact and build memories with with you, too. HUGS!!

Missus Wookie said...

I'm playing catch up so have onlly just read this. We home schooled ours and both kids needed that time away - dd into a brick and mortar school, ds off with my parents for a bit.

Holding you and your family in the light as things move forward.